"Oh the Places You'll Go!"

"Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go."

These are the opening paragraphs for Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go!" Isn't it funny how some little tid bit of information, an event, or an experience can sit in the back of one's mind, just waiting for the perfect moment to go "click!" Sometimes it's more like "BAM!" Or maybe "dugh..."

Two years ago, at the end of my Life Coach training, one of my instructors read us this story, "Oh the Places You'll Go!" I had read the book myself several times before, so although I was amused with my instructor's silly antics while reading, I wasn't particularly moved by the text.

Until today.

As I was deciding what information to include in this newsletter, it hit me that just a few months ago I was contemplating going back to a "real" job. You know, the kind where you work 9-5, fifty weeks a year, making a lot of money for someone else. If you're lucky, much of your life is not sucked up by a lengthy commute, and you actually enjoy what what you do. And as I considered how nice the "security" would be, I realized that I would also be giving up something for which I have intense passion, and also brings me great joy.

So, I decided it was time. I needed to go places. I didn't know where I would go, or how. In fact, the more I tried to figure this out, the more confused I got. I needed to stop thinking and just move my feet!

And where has it taken me? I am so excited to announce that I will be joining the brand new Med Spa New England in downtown Plymouth! The space is absolutely gorgeous. I will be able to provide coaching, group coaching, workshops and special events all in one place, while sharing the space with some great practitioners! If you are close enough, I hope you will stop in November 24th or 25th from 11:00-4:00 for our Holiday Open House!

And the journey has just begun. With my new radio program, a product launch in the works, all of my amazing clients and the new connections I am making, who knows where I'll end up!

What journey have you been wanting to take? Do you want to write a novel? Join a club? Climb Mount Everest? Or simply take some time to soak in the bath tub? Dr. Seuss has some inspiring words for you...

"And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3 / 4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...be your name Buxbaum or Bixby
or Brayor Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!"

How to Take On That Nasty Four Letter Word... F#%!

No, it's not the word you were thinking about! Clean up that mind of yours :) I am talking about "FEAR."

Do you live with fear? Excellent! Fear is good. Oh, I know there are those who say that fear is your gut telling you that you are doing something wrong. Or that you aren't trusting God (the Universe, Buddha, or whatever word you use to refer to your Higher Power). And there are also those who believe that fear keeps us safe. Well, unless you are actually being physically accosted, right now, which most of thankfully are not, you are safe.

Notice I said live with fear, not in fear. The switch of those two words makes all the difference! Mark Twain once stated, "Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear." This quote is loaded with power. Power, because it is the difference between allowing fear to control you, and...

• challenging oneself! You know, those overused cliches which I am now going to shamelessly plug in right here - "step out of the box" and "step out of your comfort zone."


• following your bliss! Those times when you get an idea and think wow, I would really love to (fill in the blank with your own passions here), and then you figure out a way to do it! Or at least take one small step to get you on your way.


• defining your own beliefs! It's about going deeper into the ideas we have been taught by our families, friends, churches, communities, and the media - and then creating our own thoughts, explanations and meanings for this crazy thing we call LIFE.


• standing up for your own beliefs! Regardless. It doesn't matter what others believe, when you are aligned with your head and your heart, this is what counts. It's all good.

But who am I kidding? Living with fear is not always easy! I have found myself on more than one occasion, trembling, sleepless, questioning, doubting, perspiring, stammering, hyperventilating, overeating, vomiting and even crying, because I shifted from "with fear" to "in fear." It's OK if you find yourself here. Just shift yourself back.

So how does one "master" fear, as the wise Mr. Twain suggests? Here are a few tricks that have helped me. I would love to hear what you do...

1.) BREATHE- I know this sounds silly to some, so new age. Well, actually, it is not. When people get stressed, we have a tendency to tighten our diaphragms and restrict the oxygen flow. Less oxygen in your body means less to your brain. Want to think the problem through? Give your brain some food- and breathe!

2.) BE IN THE MOMENT- Unless you are currently being physically accosted (in which case, stop thinking, it's time to fight or flee!) you are most likely afraid of something that has already happened, or has yet to happen. The past is gone, the future is not here. Neither are concrete or tangible. You only have this moment. Right now. And right now. And right now. Say it--- "I am safe in this moment!" And if it's too scary to live day by day, or hour by hour, live second by second. Tell yourself "I am going to deal with this moment only. I will deal with the next moment, in a moment. Right now I am only focusing on this moment."

Another great trick is to write out the worst possible thing that you can imagine happening. OK, now ask yourself, how would I handle this, if indeed, the worst possible thing does happen? Take control, you can do it! Write down how you would deal with it, every possible solution.

3.) VISUALIZE- Alright, now rip up that paper about the worst case scenario, and get focused on what you WANT to see happen. Write that down and keep it! Decorate it! Post it! Put it on your computer's screen saver! Write a jingle about it! Whatever works, but visit it often! As Dr. Denis Waitley says, "When you visualize, your materialize."

4.) HAVE FAITH- To many people, this is a complicated word. To me, it is not. Faith means "belief" or "confidence" or "trust." It doesn't matter if your faith lies with God, many Gods, Buddha, Allah, yourself, your family, your pet rock or your lucky underwear. The only thing that counts is that you have it! This means trusting that you will get through whatever it is you are fearing.

And you will get through it. Honestly, you have no choice right? Unless you run from it. But there are serious repercussions for this. You may be giving up your passions. Or maybe that thing you are running from is going to come back and bite you in the ass! Either way, it is not a pretty picture. So face it.

5.) SEEK SUPPORT- You don't have to face your fear alone. Trust that you will get the support you need. Why not? It doesn't hurt. It doesn't cost anything. And it will keep you from feeling alone. Keep yourself open to possibility. You never know where this support is going to come from. It may be in the last place you ever imagined. Or, it may be from a person or place you didn't even imagine!

I myself like to send angels to the rescue. I don't know if there really are angels out there. Maybe, maybe not. No matter. No one can "prove" either side, so I choose the one that makes me feel good! And the thought of 10,000 angles flying in to surround me with love an support is amazingly calm. And then, it works. Every time. Are the angles helping me? Is it just that I am calm enough now to figure things out? As I said, no matter.

6.) GO WITH THE FLOW- You do not have to have all of the answers. Try to avoid those why questions. Don't over-think it, feel it instead. Say to yourself, "It is what it is" and wait to see what happens next- with excitement. Life can be like a big grab bag. You don't know what's inside the bag when you get it. Sometimes you are happy with the contents, and other times it's not quite what you had hoped for. Either way, you always have those moments of exhilaration before you open the bag! Every day can be like that if you choose!

7.) GROW- So you picked the grab bag labeled "for a girl" and inside you find; a deck of cards, a toothbrush, some plain yellow pencils, a "Biker Babe" tattoo, and some stale gum. Not quite the sparkly fingernail polish or shiny jewelry you were hoping for. Oh well. Now what do you do with this?

You learn! Maybe you choose not to buy any more grab bags. Or maybe you will buy them from another store. Or maybe you get the "for a boy" bag next time. Whatever you decide, if you choose to grow from the experience then disappointment is never for not!

So now... as you embrace this world of fear, start small. There's no need to quit your job and start your own business on a shoe string. You don't have to jump on the surf board and start paddling out into the 6 foot waves. And you certainly don't have to sell 90% of your belongings in a yard sale and move out of state because you hate the cold. (Not that I know ANYTHING about these crazy ideas!)

Instead, try creating a business plan, taking surfing lessons, or getting your child custody agreement changed first. Unless of course you are moved to do otherwise. In this case, I say- GO FOR IT!